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Poppy Z. Brite is using LabRat's ass (my cat, LabRat, that is) for her LiveJournal icon. How effing cool is that?!?!?!? January 25, 2005 11:48PM
10:32 pm
At what point did my (albeit eccentric) suburban middle class family get all Springer on me?
I know the weirdness with the men started before she moved to middle-of-nowhere Tennessee, but I'm thinking the country air has not been so great for Mom's mental health.....
Last night (during Everwood, no less) my mother called. Very calmly she asked "Is it okay if I vent at you for a little while?"
Stupidly, I said "sure."
She immediately started sobbing and let out with something very close to "Lying, cheating deadbeat mother-fucker, crack whore trying to kill me cell phone!"
Assuming she was referring to her well-meaning but dumb as a sack of rocks alcoholic ex, I asked her to please calm down and tell me what Donald had done now.
"We were at dinner and he got a call and it was that crack whore...." (degenerate drug addict that used to live down the road from my mother) "...and it was from a phone HE BOUGHT HER WITH MY MONEY. He owes me all that money and he's bought that whore.... she really IS a whore, you know. Her husband pimps her... a cell phone!!!" *sob*
Understanding why she would be a little upset over Donald spending money on the degenerate drug addict prostitute when he owes her easily a quarter of a million dollars, I was still a little confused by the hysterics.
"Have you been drinking?" I asked.
"NO I HAVEN'T BEEN FUCKING DRINKING!!!" " I confronted him about the phone and he he told me EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" *sob*
: about the phone?"
*sob* *sniff* "that too."
"what else?"
"He was fucking that WHORE while he was still living with ME!!!!!" *sob* *snort*
Me: "er...."
"AND HE WAS PAYING FOR IT WITH MY MONEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" *sob* *snort* *whine* *sob* *sob*
"So, while you were supporting him and having unprotected sex with him, Donald was having sex with an intraveneous drug using prostitute?"
"YES!!!!!!!!" *sob* *snort*
"You're making a doctor's appointment to be tested, yes?"
"Yes. Son of a bitch! This is HUMILIATING. IF HE GAVE ME ANYTHING I AM GOING TO DESTROY HIM. I AM GOING TO MAKE HIS LIFE HELL. SON OF A BITCH! MOTHER FUCKER!!!!!" *sob*
"And...er.... your reaction when he told you all of this?"
"I screamed at him. SON OF A BITCH. FREE LOADING PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!!"
"er...."
So, anyway, that's the basic gist of the conversation. I'm pretty sure I left out a few expletaves which are NOT my mother's usual style.
Anyway, I'm a little freaked out by the torrid white-trashyness of the situation and extremely concerned about the possibilities for horrible diseases Donald may have passed along here. I felt very menstrual and on edge today. One particular "customer" (who ended up throwing a book at a cashier) has no idea how close she came to serious bodily injury. Fortunately, I am a strong believer in karma and am confident that the uber-cunt will soon crash her car into a tree or something. At least that's what I told her, before I let her stomp away.....
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January 23 2005
January 23, 2005 11:23PM
10:30 pm
I think Boston Legal is the funniest show on TV. LabRat's ass is famous now. I just discovered a bunch of blogs (by people I've never even heard of) and messageboards where people link to pictures of LabRat's tiny hiny when writing about people of whom they are not fond. Though, I do not see how anybody could view any part of LabRat in anything but a positive way.
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2005-01-26
10:25 p.m.
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abwhite
