|
abwhite
|
great reads dorknoodle zombiepoodle squirrelx porktornado daemonchild ckjosh oppusshrugged nitejohnboy OUTSIDE bitchin stuff links get a job shopping Dynomoose Central ebay message board chat wish list the art conspiracy fotolog bitchin stuff free tee shirts BowieNet REALITY Tickets BowieNet Store INSIDE newest older search terms notify profile notes guestbook rings trading card host design 
|
Why am I, of all people, putting a diary online? Nothing happens in my life! I stay in my apartment all day and night making Voodoo dolls while watching TV or feeding the cats. Nick steered me to this site when we were discussing maybe writing a book about this sexually indiscriminate man he was once friends with and with whom I was involved for more years than I even want to admit to. We are supposed to put our contributions to the book in the diary we set up for that purpose. Thing is, my memories on that painful subject are really jumbled, so I may just have to spew out everything I remember elsewhere then put something coherent together to give to Nick. It is nauseating to admit to having felt so stongly towards someone who would put his dick in any man, woman or child that is willing, and to have felt that was for so long. Every time I go back to Michigan for a visit or, more often, some unavoidable family business, I feel this combination of hope and sick terror that I will run into him somewhere. To run into him while with my husband would be even worse and more confusing. Another thig bothering me is that my best friend of many MANY years is getting Married in October and everything surrounding the trip and the wedding has me stressed. For starters, she's turned into this total right wing religious nut. I blame to super-controling mother-in-law to be for this. The woman made her adopt a religion compatable with Catholicism so that she won't boycott the wedding. Then there's the fact that my husband and I are going to be staying with Nick and his boyfriend (shit, after 16 years boyfriend is a bit watered down, don't you think?). They've never met Joe (my husband) and I am concerned that Nick won't approve of Joe's bad grammar and cuddly physique and the Joe won't approve of Nick and Steven's pretty much constant drug use. Oh and we can't forget that Nick and my friend Efrem are finally going to meet. I've always been pretty good a compartmentalizing my friends, but this is no longer practical with my trips to Michigan being short and few. Nick and Efrem are very much alike in startlingly different ways. They are both highly intelligent and even more highly pretentious. They are also very unalike. They will either absolutely love eachother, or despise eachother immediately. Either way, I fear it will not be good. Damn, I'm usually so chipper but this entry is very dark and whiney. I'll try to be a little more upbeat next time!
Golly, after reading this, I find it rather odd that this entry's Voodoo doll was purity!
|
2002-06-29 |
|
|
|
